Good morning, everyone. Damn but it's cold (by German standards). Actually that old Prairies saw "... but it's a dry cold" really does apply, it's the humidity that makes this weather so unpleasant. Winter is here in fact if not yet fully in temperature, the air had that oddly grainy just-above-freezing texture yesterday.
Five minutes seems to be my limit these days, I naturally "come up for air" at that point, and recently haven't been pushing myself back under.
mmm ... warm socks. I have to confess that one of my slight quirks is that on a cold night I put my clothes for the next day under a blanket at the end of my bed, so that they store up some heat for the morning. We have no heating, apart from a wood stove we light in the evening, but I find something quite thrilling about forcing myself out of bed into the cold. I lived without heating for a lot of my life so it's not a major hardship.
((barbara)) that just sounds simply awful. Wishing you whatever it takes to find some space for yourself in the situation.
I am in a difficult place today. Yesterday I jumped (there was no illusion of falling) off the wagon that I've been on for over a year. It predictably ended in disaster, in fact I think it was the disaster rather than the drink that I was seeking.
The hardest part is that I know why it happened and how it could have been avoided. That old ego again ... too afraid of asking for a simple act of help. The request would probably have been met, but had it not been, my ego could not have coped with what it would have perceived as a direct rejection rather than a complicated cohesion of situations and feelings.
Still, today I am trying to unravel it, uncurl myself from the brace position, and not take one slip up (not that I believe it was a slip, slips are accidental) as anything more than a day on which all did not go to plan. Start again today.
Stray,lots of love and hugs to you. You're only human and it sounds as though you've had so much to cope with recently - I hope you can not beat yourself up, just pick yourself up and start again today. Your house in the woods with lots of glass and only a wood stove sounds amazing.
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Good morning, everyone. Damn but it's cold (by German standards). Actually that old Prairies saw "... but it's a dry cold" really does apply, it's the humidity that makes this weather so unpleasant. Winter is here in fact if not yet fully in temperature, the air had that oddly grainy just-above-freezing texture yesterday.
Five minutes seems to be my limit these days, I naturally "come up for air" at that point, and recently haven't been pushing myself back under.
Hugs and warm socks to all.
mmm ... warm socks. I have to confess that one of my slight quirks is that on a cold night I put my clothes for the next day under a blanket at the end of my bed, so that they store up some heat for the morning. We have no heating, apart from a wood stove we light in the evening, but I find something quite thrilling about forcing myself out of bed into the cold. I lived without heating for a lot of my life so it's not a major hardship.
((barbara)) that just sounds simply awful. Wishing you whatever it takes to find some space for yourself in the situation.
I am in a difficult place today. Yesterday I jumped (there was no illusion of falling) off the wagon that I've been on for over a year. It predictably ended in disaster, in fact I think it was the disaster rather than the drink that I was seeking.
The hardest part is that I know why it happened and how it could have been avoided. That old ego again ... too afraid of asking for a simple act of help. The request would probably have been met, but had it not been, my ego could not have coped with what it would have perceived as a direct rejection rather than a complicated cohesion of situations and feelings.
Still, today I am trying to unravel it, uncurl myself from the brace position, and not take one slip up (not that I believe it was a slip, slips are accidental) as anything more than a day on which all did not go to plan. Start again today.
Hugs to all, xx
So nice to have your around again, Udge.
Stray,lots of love and hugs to you. You're only human and it sounds as though you've had so much to cope with recently - I hope you can not beat yourself up, just pick yourself up and start again today. Your house in the woods with lots of glass and only a wood stove sounds amazing.
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