I got the most unlikely reminder of meditation last night ... watching 'Celebrity big brother' in the uk .. Dirk (The Face from The A-team) was talking about goodbyes and letting go, and that the spiritual center of his meditation was the willingness to exhale freely. To breathe out, let go of oxygen which keeps us alive and trust that it will be ok.
Food for thought. Or perhaps I should sod the thinking and just breathe for a bit.
Work is genuinely insane. Kidneys are working again, and my head feels like a less bizarre if still slightly messy place. Monday night the dog ran over something very sharp and nearly lost her paw. Managed to deal with it (thank god I'm not squeamish) and she is doing very well after her operation to fix it.
I am trying to accept the need to accept, and that I can only fix what I can fix.
Ruth, a huge decision. My own experience of working with damaged kids - all be it as a youth leader rather than a parent - is that it is incredibly rewarding, if exhausting. I expect you already know that! My recent experience with the dog finely honed what I already knew about how agonising it is to care about someone (or an animal) in pain. But ... you cannot protect your children from life's knocks anyway. Philip Larkin had it all dead right ...
I have a few adopted friends. My dad only just met his real father and was pretty much brought up by grandparents. But his carers showed him unconditional love and acceptance. My mum spent her childhood with both parents but steeped in anger and resentment and instability. So ... yeah ... it's all too complex isn't it :)
Good luck with whatever process you're going through to make a decision.
1 Comments:
Hey all, and welcome Rhea.
I got the most unlikely reminder of meditation last night ... watching 'Celebrity big brother' in the uk .. Dirk (The Face from The A-team) was talking about goodbyes and letting go, and that the spiritual center of his meditation was the willingness to exhale freely. To breathe out, let go of oxygen which keeps us alive and trust that it will be ok.
Food for thought. Or perhaps I should sod the thinking and just breathe for a bit.
Work is genuinely insane. Kidneys are working again, and my head feels like a less bizarre if still slightly messy place. Monday night the dog ran over something very sharp and nearly lost her paw. Managed to deal with it (thank god I'm not squeamish) and she is doing very well after her operation to fix it.
I am trying to accept the need to accept, and that I can only fix what I can fix.
Ruth, a huge decision. My own experience of working with damaged kids - all be it as a youth leader rather than a parent - is that it is incredibly rewarding, if exhausting. I expect you already know that! My recent experience with the dog finely honed what I already knew about how agonising it is to care about someone (or an animal) in pain. But ... you cannot protect your children from life's knocks anyway. Philip Larkin had it all dead right ...
I have a few adopted friends. My dad only just met his real father and was pretty much brought up by grandparents. But his carers showed him unconditional love and acceptance. My mum spent her childhood with both parents but steeped in anger and resentment and instability. So ... yeah ... it's all too complex isn't it :)
Good luck with whatever process you're going through to make a decision.
Sx
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