In response to Bitterroot's question from yesterday re. in-person practice groups...
Right now, I pretty much practice on my own. Being so firmly entrenched (for good or ill!) in my Zen school, that particular style of practice is what I'm used to in terms of the actual ritual of what we do. Zen is very much a "do it rather than talk about it" practice, and that fits my personality. When I do drive down to either the Cambridge or Providence Zen Centers, each of which is about 2 hours away, it feels great to practice with other breathing bodies. But I don't feel much desire to talk about my practice since when it comes to meditation, there's not much really to talk about. :-)
There is a mindfulness meditation group/center here in Keene that I've been to once. It seems like a fine group with a good number of people going to it (more than the Zen group I led for several years here). But since it's not in my style/school of Zen, it felt weird sitting there: not bad, just foreign. I guess it would feel like a Catholic going to a Baptist church just because it was the only church in town: yes, it's still Christianity, and yes, the folks who go there are fine people, but it's not your tradition.
So, the only folks I regularly meditate with are the folks who come to my meditation group at school: a small handful of semi-regulars. We meet over lunch-hour, so there's not much time for socializing, just the practice of sitting. For now, that's enough, I guess: better than nothing.
I don't have an ongoing in-person meditation group. That's one big reason why this group has meant so much to me and made such a difference.
My sangha, if I have one, is the people who go to Gaia House retreat centre in Devon, where I try and go a couple of times a year. This is non-affiliated and mostly fairly secular centre, founded by Western teachers mostly in the Theravadin Buddhist tradition and loosely connected with the US Insight movement, though also among the guidng teachers are Martine and Stephen Batchelor who have both been Korean Zen monastics (and he also a Tibetan monk). Gaia House is a large, shabby, rambling former convent in the countryside. Compared with other buddhist centres in the UK it is known for long hours of meditation and rigourous adherence to silence on retreat. I wish it was up the road, because I have not found a group in London where I feel equally at home. There are Gaia House meditation groups around the country, but the one in London foundered on the pace of London living - people could not make once a week, then they could not make once a month... They do also host teachers in other Buddhist traditions, and I think the height of my meditation experience to date (said firmly tongue in cheek -of course I don't make these judgements, well not much) has been a week-long retreat with Reb Anderson from the San Francisco Zen (Soto, not Lorianne's School) Center. So I now have a huge ambition to go and stay there. Will I ever have a regular meditation group near home? I'd like to think that when I find a new home that will be part of it. But maybe I'm someone who won't ever have this, just as I've never been married or been part of a long-lasting couple.
What I have found quite wonderful about both groups (100 Days and the in-person sangha I mentioned last night) is the compassionate listening aspect. Here, on-line, I was struck at the very beginning by the compassion shown to folks who express pain or difficulty. I didn't think such warmth could be possible in an on-line setting. I am very happy I was wrong.
In-person, our focus is on daily life awareness as an outgrowth of our meditation practice; complex personal issues may arise within the framework of that discussion. Some of these are humorous as I mentioned last night, some are a source of great anguish. In either case, the compassionate listening of the other sangha members is of a quality I have never experienced in most normal interchanges, even with dear friends and my beloved family. It is not a group therapy session; there is no effort to "solve" any of these issues. But we all come away with a renewed spirit, which leads to stronger commitment to practice.
There are extremely serious family health issues in my life that I contend with every day, so I am very grateful for both groups.
Bitterroot, I am sorry you face such hard stuff in your life. You retain remarkable grace and awareness of beauty. I think it's all about living in societies that overwhelmingly demand that we pretend everything's okay. The effort of this is so huge and so painful, it guarantees that nothing is okay. So everywhere you don't have to pretend, but feel accepted and accept yourself as you really are is sacred. Groups like this. Groups that, as you say, don't offer solutions or therapy, but just listen compassionately. And my own cushion, my own head, the silence of the meditation hall, sitting there and accepting myself, is the same thing.
and yet, it is good and encouraging to here everyone pipe up!
i do not have a group apart from this. used to love the group in brighton and still dream of going to santa barbara. meanwhile i am very very lully. it has been a very difficult few days, and these days i just have not found the space to sit. I am now finding this frustrating. Leave for tour tomorrow and I will try and reanimate my practice then. Meanwhile thanks for allowing me to be here in my imperfect non-sittiing state but with bare my intention. You have no idea what that means to me right now.
I think it's all about living in societies that overwhelmingly demand that we pretend everything's okay. The effort of this is so huge and so painful...
Oh Jean, this is so, so true.
So everywhere you don't have to pretend, but feel accepted and accept yourself as you really are is sacred.
The kindness and empathy of your response here is a perfect example of what I was talking about with the compassionate listening. Thank you.
Ruth, bon voyage! And we are all ever so imperfect; so refreshing to feel in such good company.
To answer Beth's call, yup, I'm here and definitely have been feeling lullish, and off course from meditation. However, I'll get back eventually. I just have to be very patient and encouraging with myself as my energy is diverted at the moment.
To answer Bitterroot's question, I do not have a group I meditate with. I value the connections here as a result.
7 Comments:
In response to Bitterroot's question from yesterday re. in-person practice groups...
Right now, I pretty much practice on my own. Being so firmly entrenched (for good or ill!) in my Zen school, that particular style of practice is what I'm used to in terms of the actual ritual of what we do. Zen is very much a "do it rather than talk about it" practice, and that fits my personality. When I do drive down to either the Cambridge or Providence Zen Centers, each of which is about 2 hours away, it feels great to practice with other breathing bodies. But I don't feel much desire to talk about my practice since when it comes to meditation, there's not much really to talk about. :-)
There is a mindfulness meditation group/center here in Keene that I've been to once. It seems like a fine group with a good number of people going to it (more than the Zen group I led for several years here). But since it's not in my style/school of Zen, it felt weird sitting there: not bad, just foreign. I guess it would feel like a Catholic going to a Baptist church just because it was the only church in town: yes, it's still Christianity, and yes, the folks who go there are fine people, but it's not your tradition.
So, the only folks I regularly meditate with are the folks who come to my meditation group at school: a small handful of semi-regulars. We meet over lunch-hour, so there's not much time for socializing, just the practice of sitting. For now, that's enough, I guess: better than nothing.
I don't have an ongoing in-person meditation group. That's one big reason why this group has meant so much to me and made such a difference.
My sangha, if I have one, is the people who go to Gaia House retreat centre in Devon, where I try and go a couple of times a year. This is non-affiliated and mostly fairly secular centre, founded by Western teachers mostly in the Theravadin Buddhist tradition and loosely connected with the US Insight movement, though also among the guidng teachers are Martine and Stephen Batchelor who have both been Korean Zen monastics (and he also a Tibetan monk). Gaia House is a large, shabby, rambling former convent in the countryside. Compared with other buddhist centres in the UK it is known for long hours of meditation and rigourous adherence to silence on retreat. I wish it was up the road, because I have not found a group in London where I feel equally at home. There are Gaia House meditation groups around the country, but the one in London foundered on the pace of London living - people could not make once a week, then they could not make once a month... They do also host teachers in other Buddhist traditions, and I think the height of my meditation experience to date (said firmly tongue in cheek -of course I don't make these judgements, well not much) has been a week-long retreat with Reb Anderson from the San Francisco Zen (Soto, not Lorianne's School) Center. So I now have a huge ambition to go and stay there. Will I ever have a regular meditation group near home? I'd like to think that when I find a new home that will be part of it. But maybe I'm someone who won't ever have this, just as I've never been married or been part of a long-lasting couple.
What I have found quite wonderful about both groups (100 Days and the in-person sangha I mentioned last night) is the compassionate listening aspect. Here, on-line, I was struck at the very beginning by the compassion shown to folks who express pain or difficulty. I didn't think such warmth could be possible in an on-line setting. I am very happy I was wrong.
In-person, our focus is on daily life awareness as an outgrowth of our meditation practice; complex personal issues may arise within the framework of that discussion. Some of these are humorous as I mentioned last night, some are a source of great anguish. In either case, the compassionate listening of the other sangha members is of a quality I have never experienced in most normal interchanges, even with dear friends and my beloved family. It is not a group therapy session; there is no effort to "solve" any of these issues. But we all come away with a renewed spirit, which leads to stronger commitment to practice.
There are extremely serious family health issues in my life that I contend with every day, so I am very grateful for both groups.
Bitterroot, I am sorry you face such hard stuff in your life. You retain remarkable grace and awareness of beauty. I think it's all about living in societies that overwhelmingly demand that we pretend everything's okay. The effort of this is so huge and so painful, it guarantees that nothing is okay. So everywhere you don't have to pretend, but feel accepted and accept yourself as you really are is sacred. Groups like this. Groups that, as you say, don't offer solutions or therapy, but just listen compassionately. And my own cushion, my own head, the silence of the meditation hall, sitting there and accepting myself, is the same thing.
lull lull lull...
and yet, it is good and encouraging to here everyone pipe up!
i do not have a group apart from this. used to love the group in brighton and still dream of going to santa barbara. meanwhile i am very very lully. it has been a very difficult few days, and these days i just have not found the space to sit. I am now finding this frustrating. Leave for tour tomorrow and I will try and reanimate my practice then. Meanwhile thanks for allowing me to be here in my imperfect non-sittiing state but with bare my intention. You have no idea what that means to me right now.
Love to all, and wrap up warm!
I think it's all about living in societies that overwhelmingly demand that we pretend everything's okay. The effort of this is so huge and so painful...
Oh Jean, this is so, so true.
So everywhere you don't have to pretend, but feel accepted and accept yourself as you really are is sacred.
The kindness and empathy of your response here is a perfect example of what I was talking about with the compassionate listening. Thank you.
Ruth, bon voyage! And we are all ever so imperfect; so refreshing to feel in such good company.
Ruth, have a good tour!
To answer Beth's call, yup, I'm here and definitely have been feeling lullish, and off course from meditation. However, I'll get back eventually. I just have to be very patient and encouraging with myself as my energy is diverted at the moment.
To answer Bitterroot's question, I do not have a group I meditate with. I value the connections here as a result.
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