This enforced rest - with lots of time not only to meditate but to reflect - is making me look at my own patterns. I've always been such a take-charge person, responsive to pressure and challenge, and very efficient - which creates a cycle where people depend on you even more, and you take on more. But over the past year the pressure has clearly been too much. I'm going to have to make some changes and choices - but more than that, I realize I must look deeper, at why I am the way I am, what this pattern feeds in me. (As if I hadn't done enough of that??) It feels like the tip of an iceberg. And how hard it is for me to just "chill"! But I have to, rather than thinking, "I've got to get back on my feet right away, there's so much I have to do!" But I know if I can be open to it, there's a big lesson coming up.
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Oops, I added my comment for today to yesterday's post.
This enforced rest - with lots of time not only to meditate but to reflect - is making me look at my own patterns. I've always been such a take-charge person, responsive to pressure and challenge, and very efficient - which creates a cycle where people depend on you even more, and you take on more. But over the past year the pressure has clearly been too much. I'm going to have to make some changes and choices - but more than that, I realize I must look deeper, at why I am the way I am, what this pattern feeds in me. (As if I hadn't done enough of that??) It feels like the tip of an iceberg. And how hard it is for me to just "chill"! But I have to, rather than thinking, "I've got to get back on my feet right away, there's so much I have to do!" But I know if I can be open to it, there's a big lesson coming up.
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