Good morning, everybody. Following the success of meditating on a memory image a few days back, I've been trying something new (to me), meditating on the image of a mountain. (I'm working from the German-language version of a book with CDs by John Kabat-Zinn.)
Sat very uneasily today, too much on my mind again. But this too will pass (thanks, Dale).
And now, a little entertainment for the Buddhists among us.
Good morning Udge. Said through giggles. Thanks, that's one to print out and keep. I like Jon Kabat-Zinn's writing and admire his work. He'll be giving a talk in London shortly and I hope to go.
well, udge, while you were meditating on your mountain I was back by my seashore....thanks for the link - will look forward to it when I have a proper connection.
feeling VERY VERY vulnerable right now. Can't seem to get away from feeling beaten down with criticism at home and at work, even now the problem with our colleague has been resolved. Funny in groups how, when someone drops the negative energy ball, someone else just picks it right up! and yesterday it was me. spent all the reharsal in tears ...didn't help that I did not find a minute to sit in the continuous 9 hours of work.
Any tips on how to deal with criticsm - a meditational focus for the coming days? - from you wise people???
so HAD to get back to my breathing seashore thismorning. Interesting how it was easier as I was so eager to get away from my self and all my thoughts of self doubt and shame, and what a relief it was to sit there for 15 minutes. Now I'm out for some tree therapy in the park and hopefully I will be in a better state at work today.
Stopped giggling. Ruth, sending you lots of love - I'm so sorry you're feeling so lousy. I can only imagine how it is if your work demands that you make yourself raw and open and then someone comes along and stomps all over that openness, and then it hurts like hell every time anyone goes near the stomped-on openness. I think it's great that you can still find the space and energy for meditation, fresh air and exercise.
ps How to deal with criticism? Not to try and deal with it, perhaps, but to be with it, not judging whether it's 'justified' or not, until it loses it's sting? difficult. much compassion required.
Lorianne, Udge, MB: thanks so much for your supportive words re yesterday's scare. Lorianne - you are right, the fear of crime is a violation in itself. I have to admit I slept in the lounge last night, rather than the bedroom which adjoins the room where my neighbour was broken into. But I want to resume normal habits tonight ..
Udge: non-Buddhists find that funny too! But on my bad days I would probably think it is just stating a universal truth.
Ruth: I wish I had advice, but I don't re criticism. It is very hard. Wishing you well as you deal with this.
Have just sat for 15 minutes, I didn't think at the outset my thoughts would slow down at all, worries about home, lack of work, relationships, but they did. It does work.
Too many comments from me, but I just realised that I missed reading yesterday's completely! Mary, my sympathies on the burglaries close to you - how miserable and scary. Take care of yourself, and hope the job search brings something congenial.
Lorianne, hmnn, meditation as showering? I do like it. On many levels. Actually getting into the shower is the effort, once in, I love the hot, steamy water, shampooing and conditioning and soaping down! Like being in a waterfall in the tropics, cleansing, refreshing. That meditation could be, hmnn, as purifying and rejuvinating and enjoyable!
Mary, oh, burglars, yes, the fear is a violation, and you need to feel safe in your home, your sanctuary. Is there anything you can do to make it safer? Even a cheap alarm from a hardware store can give extra peace of mind. And good luck on yesterday's job interview.
Udge, send some of that mountain over here! Toronto's flat, a city created by people for people, the natural landscape, like Lake Ontario, cut off by a highway. Still, it has nice parks...
Oh, Ruth, the long, intense hours of practice, a form of meditation in itself, and away from home, and the physical discomfort of sitting long hours, and not just negativity but now criticism. Which is most difficult. Can you say, focus on the issue please, I'm feeling criticized and it's not helping- ? Sometimes people get carried away on tangents and need to be reminded to stop. Sending you loving kindness and joy...
Ruth, I have a hard time with criticism too, especially when I'm feeling vulnerable because I've been trying hard. It's hard not to feel very misunderstood, defensive, and alone at those times. I think just "being with it" is good advice - but also remember that you are a beautiful, loving being and that all that can ever be asked of any of us is to try to do our best. I'm sure you do that every day.
My meditation tims lately have been quite calm, despite lots of thoughts. I've been grateful for them. Late afternoon or early evening are still the best times for me. I did some bows last night - it felt good but also quite awkward, and my space is not private at all so I felt sort of furtive. I will try again when I have more privacy.
The storm has passed, my personal storm inside and nature’s recent rampage. The sun came out yesterday, and even a rainbow (unusual in our small corner of paradise). Last night several times I woke myself up laughing … don’t remember the dreams, but the feeling has remained with me all day.
Much gratitude to my friends here who sent kind words, warm wishes and hugs … and special thanks to Dale for your reminder about impermanence. Funny how I’m always aware of impermanence in the good times and tend to forget all about it in the not-so-good.
A student told Suzuki Roshi, “sometimes I get lethargic and discouraged about life and Zen practice.” Roshi answered, “that is good, all practice has these moments.”
thank you everyone for your kind and helpful words, and particularly janice. Your quote hits the nail on the head, and beth for your plain honesty and compassion. jean, yes, 'being with' is the best we can do as imperfect beings.
ironically all is fresh and good today. sometimes one just needs to let go the tears.
mary i totally understand the feelings about having your safety abused by the threat. In these cicumstances, perhaps it is interesting (whilst sleeping in the living room and installing an alarm) to look at the fear which is a direct result of the threat and what deeper fears it brings up?
the dance with criticism for me takes me back to very very old feelings about my sibling. interesting (and painful) to note they are still very much around when I drop my guard.
((Ruth)), criticism can be difficult, particularly when it raises old shadow feelings from other times. One of my ways to regain balance in the face of criticism is to remind myself that I can be wonderful without being perfect. There's a lot of elbow room and love in that kind of self-statement, I find, elbow room to improve if it's warranted, or to realize that (just like the critic!) I'm only human, and the reassurance that I am in my own unique way wonderful and enough, regardless of any situation or perceptions or agendas. For me, this gives me back my power and center of balance.
Mary, I hope tonight is more peaceful for you. Sanctuary and sleep are important.
Janice, glad to hear things are calmer on all fronts.
12 Comments:
Good morning, everybody. Following the success of meditating on a memory image a few days back, I've been trying something new (to me), meditating on the image of a mountain. (I'm working from the German-language version of a book with CDs by John Kabat-Zinn.)
Sat very uneasily today, too much on my mind again. But this too will pass (thanks, Dale).
And now, a little entertainment for the Buddhists among us.
Good morning Udge. Said through giggles. Thanks, that's one to print out and keep. I like Jon Kabat-Zinn's writing and admire his work. He'll be giving a talk in London shortly and I hope to go.
morning everyone.
well, udge, while you were meditating on your mountain I was back by my seashore....thanks for the link - will look forward to it when I have a proper connection.
feeling VERY VERY vulnerable right now. Can't seem to get away from feeling beaten down with criticism at home and at work, even now the problem with our colleague has been resolved. Funny in groups how, when someone drops the negative energy ball, someone else just picks it right up! and yesterday it was me. spent all the reharsal in tears ...didn't help that I did not find a minute to sit in the continuous 9 hours of work.
Any tips on how to deal with criticsm - a meditational focus for the coming days? - from you wise people???
so HAD to get back to my breathing seashore thismorning. Interesting how it was easier as I was so eager to get away from my self and all my thoughts of self doubt and shame, and what a relief it was to sit there for 15 minutes. Now I'm out for some tree therapy in the park and hopefully I will be in a better state at work today.
Stopped giggling. Ruth, sending you lots of love - I'm so sorry you're feeling so lousy. I can only imagine how it is if your work demands that you make yourself raw and open and then someone comes along and stomps all over that openness, and then it hurts like hell every time anyone goes near the stomped-on openness. I think it's great that you can still find the space and energy for meditation, fresh air and exercise.
ps How to deal with criticism? Not to try and deal with it, perhaps, but to be with it, not judging whether it's 'justified' or not, until it loses it's sting? difficult. much compassion required.
Good morning all.
Lorianne, Udge, MB: thanks so much for your supportive words re yesterday's scare. Lorianne - you are right, the fear of crime is a violation in itself. I have to admit I slept in the lounge last night, rather than the bedroom which adjoins the room where my neighbour was broken into. But I want to resume normal habits tonight ..
Udge: non-Buddhists find that funny too! But on my bad days I would probably think it is just stating a universal truth.
Ruth: I wish I had advice, but I don't re criticism. It is very hard. Wishing you well as you deal with this.
Have just sat for 15 minutes, I didn't think at the outset my thoughts would slow down at all, worries about home, lack of work, relationships, but they did. It does work.
Too many comments from me, but I just realised that I missed reading yesterday's completely! Mary, my sympathies on the burglaries close to you - how miserable and scary. Take care of yourself, and hope the job search brings something congenial.
Lorianne, hmnn, meditation as showering? I do like it. On many levels. Actually getting into the shower is the effort, once in, I love the hot, steamy water, shampooing and conditioning and soaping down! Like being in a waterfall in the tropics, cleansing, refreshing. That meditation could be, hmnn, as purifying and rejuvinating and enjoyable!
Mary, oh, burglars, yes, the fear is a violation, and you need to feel safe in your home, your sanctuary. Is there anything you can do to make it safer? Even a cheap alarm from a hardware store can give extra peace of mind. And good luck on yesterday's job interview.
Udge, send some of that mountain over here! Toronto's flat, a city created by people for people, the natural landscape, like Lake Ontario, cut off by a highway. Still, it has nice parks...
Oh, Ruth, the long, intense hours of practice, a form of meditation in itself, and away from home, and the physical discomfort of sitting long hours, and not just negativity but now criticism. Which is most difficult. Can you say, focus on the issue please, I'm feeling criticized and it's not helping- ? Sometimes people get carried away on tangents and need to be reminded to stop. Sending you loving kindness and joy...
Ruth, I have a hard time with criticism too, especially when I'm feeling vulnerable because I've been trying hard. It's hard not to feel very misunderstood, defensive, and alone at those times. I think just "being with it" is good advice - but also remember that you are a beautiful, loving being and that all that can ever be asked of any of us is to try to do our best. I'm sure you do that every day.
My meditation tims lately have been quite calm, despite lots of thoughts. I've been grateful for them. Late afternoon or early evening are still the best times for me. I did some bows last night - it felt good but also quite awkward, and my space is not private at all so I felt sort of furtive. I will try again when I have more privacy.
The storm has passed, my personal storm inside and nature’s recent rampage. The sun came out yesterday, and even a rainbow (unusual in our small corner of paradise). Last night several times I woke myself up laughing … don’t remember the dreams, but the feeling has remained with me all day.
Much gratitude to my friends here who sent kind words, warm wishes and hugs … and special thanks to Dale for your reminder about impermanence. Funny how I’m always aware of impermanence in the good times and tend to forget all about it in the not-so-good.
A student told Suzuki Roshi, “sometimes I get lethargic and discouraged about life and Zen practice.”
Roshi answered, “that is good, all practice has these moments.”
thank you everyone for your kind and helpful words, and particularly janice. Your quote hits the nail on the head, and beth for your plain honesty and compassion. jean, yes, 'being with' is the best we can do as imperfect beings.
ironically all is fresh and good today. sometimes one just needs to let go the tears.
mary i totally understand the feelings about having your safety abused by the threat. In these cicumstances, perhaps it is interesting (whilst sleeping in the living room and installing an alarm) to look at the fear which is a direct result of the threat and what deeper fears it brings up?
the dance with criticism for me takes me back to very very old feelings about my sibling. interesting (and painful) to note they are still very much around when I drop my guard.
Udge, that's very funny, thanks.
((Ruth)), criticism can be difficult, particularly when it raises old shadow feelings from other times. One of my ways to regain balance in the face of criticism is to remind myself that I can be wonderful without being perfect. There's a lot of elbow room and love in that kind of self-statement, I find, elbow room to improve if it's warranted, or to realize that (just like the critic!) I'm only human, and the reassurance that I am in my own unique way wonderful and enough, regardless of any situation or perceptions or agendas. For me, this gives me back my power and center of balance.
Mary, I hope tonight is more peaceful for you. Sanctuary and sleep are important.
Janice, glad to hear things are calmer on all fronts.
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